Getting curious about “drinking holidays”

There are some holidays that make no sense in their current iterations in American culture or in my life personally. St. Patrick’s Day and Cinco de Mayo are the two that really stand out to me.

St. Patrick’s Day: I’m not Irish. I’m not Catholic. So why the heck would I celebrate a holiday from another ethnicity or religion. If I started to celebrate a holiday from Zimbabwe or Thailand but without the full context this would be weird. I don’t really care what a particular saint did or didn’t do because they’re not a part of my religion. So many other wise humans have performed miracles and yet we don’t celebrate them. My hunch is that if it was Patricia, not Patrick that drove the snakes out of Ireland she would have been burned as a witch, not revered and canonized like he was. In Canton, the East Baltimore neighborhood I have lived in for almost 19 years, St. Patrick’s Day spans at least two weekends, but really feels like the whole month of March with celebrations.

Cinco de Mayo: I’m not Mexican, so why the heck would I celebrate this holiday either? A common misconception (for me as well until I looked into it prior to this blog post) is that Cinco de Mayo is a celebration of Mexico's independence from Spain. Turns out Mexico's Independence Day is September 16th. May 5th is actually about Mexico's unlikely victory over France in the 1862 Battle of Puebla, where Mexican forces were largely outnumbered. So all this time, I’ve been celebrating a random battle of a different country that hasn’t impacted my life? How odd! Are other countries celebrating July 4th? Totally not. Certainly not native people and not the British. Why don’t we celebrate Moroccan Independence day (November 5, 1955) or that of Belize (September 21, 1981). We’re not celebrating the battles of France, the UAE or other countries, so why Cinco de Mayo?

What do these two holidays have in common?

Booze. Lots of booze. A suggestion that if you’re not drunk, you’re not doing it “right”

St. Patrick’s Day and Cinco de Mayo have been co-opted to be drinking holidays in the USA. This includes the weekends before and after in addition to the actual day with drink specials, bar crawls, shots, and all sorts of drinking paraphernalia (including shirts and koozies with phrases about drinking) The more we drink on these holidays the more fun we have. And if we don’t go all out with the gear and get as drunk as possible then we must not be fun humans…so the logic would say.

To be clear, this was me for yearsssssss. Some of my drunkest moments were celebrating St. Patrick’s Day in Baltimore or Richmond. Often one weekend at home and then a weekend visiting friends, still wearing green and getting blacked out. And why? Because there was a party, a band, and drink discounts if I paid for the plastic cup. I would celebrate St. Patrick’s Day and Cinco de Mayo but then feel like crap. A slightly cracked phone here, a random bruise there. Puking the next day and eating unhealthy for 3-4 days. The missed opportunities to do the things I really loved (being outside mostly) But I was really celebrating huh…I was doing what popular culture said was “good” and “fun” and “normal”

Why are St. Patrick’s Day and Cinco de Mayo drinking holidays but Valentine’s Day and Easter are sugar holidays? Then you have holidays like Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas that are both drinking and sugar (food) holidays. How did this come to be? As I got sober these questions popped up more and more. “Why” is something I wrote in my journal so much that I sounded like a 4 year old. The shortest answer is (as always) Capitalism. Drink more, spend more, consume more all.the.damn.time. It’s exhausting and I knew I had to opt out because it was literally taking years off my life.

When I stopped drinking, I started to see everything so clearly, hence the dozens (okayyyyy hundreds) of questions. St. Patrick’s Day of 2019, when I was just 3 months into this journey I wrote “has it always looked like this?” I slowed down and was (finally!) able to see that celebrating a holiday to the point of blacking out is weird AF. I created space for curiosity when I stopped drinking which allowed me to notice the destructive pattern. For 15+ years I was moving so damn fast and just trying to keep up with popular culture’s demands that I couldn’t find the pattern so I certainly didn’t see it as a problem. Then for 3 years (starting in fall of 2015 when I started yoga teacher training) I saw the patterns but wasn’t ready to make a change.

This is why yoga and yoga teacher training saved my life. Sure, I learned how to do and subsequently teach tree pose. But the way bigger and more important impact was on cultivating curiosity about my thoughts, behaviors, actions and energy. I was encouraged to dig deeper, exploring my inner and outer worlds. I spent time doing what I really loved, which helped me to see that blacking out in a green shirt or drinking margaritas actually wasn’t what I wanted…it was what dominant culture told me I wanted.

I stopped drinking in January 2019, so now 5 years later to be leading a Sober Curious workshop on St. Patrick’s Day seems like I have entered an alternative reality. “How did I get here?” the line from “Once in a Lifetime” by the Talking Heads comes to mind. I got here because I got curious, because I took a step back to see what drinking holidays really cost me mentally, physically, spiritually and financially.

So what holiday will I be celebrating in the next few days? Spring Equinox of course. And I won’t be celebrating with booze or sugar. I’ll walk on the earth with my bare feet. I’ll smudge my home, open all the windows and say a prayer of thanks for the rest winter provided me and the growth spring will give me. I’ll journal and meditate, I’ll explore my dreams and play my crystal bowls. I’ll plant flowers / seeds and sit on the rooftop deck to watch the clouds float by. These forms of celebration align with me, they make me feel nourished.

Remember, you get to decide how much or little to participate in holidays. I like to think of holidays like mirrors, they help you to see your actions because the celebrations / situations are the same (or similar) year to year. If you’re noticing the pattern and you think, “hmmmm that’s not really for me” then walk away. Take some time to remove yourself from the behavior, action or thought to notice and get curious.

“What nourishes you?”

It’s a question I ask my yoga students and coaching clients. Knowing what nourishes you allows you to call in what you need and release anything that’s holding you back. And it all starts with curiosity (my #1 value). So get curious about why you do the things you do and the patterns you engage with. Why do you chug green beer one day in March if it’s not actually what you want to be doing. Why do you feel amazing after laying in the hammock watching the new buds on the trees sway? When you have the answers, you can create a new pattern, one that deeply nourishes you.

Want to get curious about how expansive a life without booze can be? Fantastic! Send me a message we’ll chat (Shawnbrownyoga@gmail.com)